Trust

Some stories in the Bible leave me with a funny feeling. I hate to admit it, but I’d like to skip over the story of God commanding Abraham to sacrifice Isaac. As a child, I didn’t understand the story. As a mother, the story makes me feel a little sick.

However, the other day I read a beautiful retelling of the story and it came from, believe it or not, Chloe’s Bible. As with our other two children, we wanted to buy Chloe her own children’s Bible for Christmas, and after reading some reviews, we decided on The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones (if you’ve never seen this Bible, I encourage you to click on the link and look at the sample pages). Every story in this Bible points to the coming of Jesus, and the story of Abraham and Isaac is no different.

Lloyd-Jones explains that God never wants anyone to die, and, just as Abraham gathered wood for the altar on which to sacrifice Isaac, God would send His own Son to carry the wood on which He would be sacrificed so we would not have to die an eternal death. But here is the part of the story that stuck with me–God tells Abraham that He doesn’t want Isaac to die; He wants Abraham to trust Him, which he did.

Trust.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that having a relationship with God isn’t just about faith, believing that God exists and always will exist. No, this relationship requires trust, trust that this God really does love me and really does have the pieces of my life fitting into a bigger puzzle that I might not see on this side of heaven.

There are some skeptics who might say that religion is a crutch, but I couldn’t disagree more. To truly trust that there is a god above watching over me in the midst of turmoil is much harder (albeit more comforting) than believing my life is subject to the whims of chance.

Because in life, there are some events that happen that leave me with a funny feeling. As a child, there were many things I didn’t understand, and, now, as a mother, there are many events that leave me feeling sick. Yet, no matter the event, I am learning that I have to trust.

Many of you already know the story of my friends Wendy and Emmett. This past June, Emmett died after a 17-month battle with stage four esophageal cancer. He was 31 and left behind his wife of almost nine years and a son, not quite four.

Their story tore me up on the inside, and I questioned God more than I should. But after questioning and telling God why He should heal Emmett, I came back to the word trust. I came back to the idea that I read in a Bible meant for little kids–God doesn’t want us to die, and He has worked out a perfect plan to rescue us from the sadness and despair that comes with living on this earth.

While Emmett was struggling with cancer, Wendy and he learned that of all the cancer funding available, only .5% goes to esophageal cancer, a cancer that leads to a death sentence for almost all who have it. This statistic made them mad, the kind of mad that caused them to want to do something to change that fact. After Emmett’s death, Team Emmett, a 501(c)(3) non-profit was born.

I don’t presume to understand God’s plan, but as I look through the pages at teamemmett.com, I find that I can trust. I trust that Emmett’s death wasn’t in vain, for God is holding his piece as part of the bigger puzzle. And I trust that through the anger and frustration that bore Team Emmett, someone else might find hope.

I hope you will take a minute and click on the Team Emmett link above. While I know we cannot all be passionate about every cause out there, I also know that most of us have had a loved one affected by cancer. If nothing else, look at their pages and pray–pray for Wendy and Quinn and the tens of thousands of others who will die from this disease this year. And if you are able, give. Without more research, a cure will not be discovered.

Linking up late with Michelle and Jen today.